Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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