soooo we both peed the bed last night...
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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