You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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