dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
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