He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
