Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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