Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
