you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
