Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
