i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I think your dad took our porno
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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