Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

and next time when you feel me up, do it right

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(410): View more from Maryland

A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.

(410): View more from Maryland

and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.

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(708): View more from Illinois

i dedicated my morning wood to you.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me

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Locals Wish Tourists Would Stop Doing These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(910): View more from North Carolina

I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name

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(602): View more from Arizona

Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.

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(765): View more from Indiana

Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.

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(323): View more from California

GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.

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(585): View more from New York

And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies

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