Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS

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  (917): my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS http://tfl.nu/r3wq
  Replies (3) Good night (1702) Bad night (681)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.

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  (773): I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out. http://tfl.nu/l8yc
  Replies (20) Good night (4727) Bad night (1050)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?

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  (716): Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil? http://tfl.nu/jfob
  Replies (14) Good night (7717) Bad night (1208)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.

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  (214): You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters. http://tfl.nu/nfga
  Replies (14) Good night (6164) Bad night (1071)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know

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  (732): There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know http://tfl.nu/hfe3
  Replies (5) Good night (1721) Bad night (1032)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.

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  (334): I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call. http://tfl.nu/huax
  Replies (3) Good night (1336) Bad night (2233)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.

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  (202): Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it. http://tfl.nu/4ii1
  Replies (2) Good night (3021) Bad night (846)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!

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  (708): Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player! http://tfl.nu/3jxt
  Replies (8) Good night (3632) Bad night (705)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.

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  (617): The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library. http://tfl.nu/8dpw
  Replies (2) Good night (1207) Bad night (915)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.

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  (717): Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes. http://tfl.nu/frv8
  Replies (2) Good night (1242) Bad night (447)
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  (914): View more from New York

  If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.

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  (914): If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run. http://tfl.nu/cpd8
  Replies (2) Good night (1539) Bad night (573)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay

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  (920): if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay http://tfl.nu/6sqm
  Replies (3) Good night (952) Bad night (469)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.

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  (480): It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning. http://tfl.nu/0fqk
  Replies (3) Good night (788) Bad night (313)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here

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  (602): The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here http://tfl.nu/0qqg
  Replies (4) Good night (896) Bad night (240)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..

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  (989): The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering.. http://tfl.nu/6vrh
  Replies (4) Good night (335) Bad night (191)

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