Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
i think i just lost a toe
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