I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Randomize
