Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize