Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
