I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
