I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Randomize