How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Randomize
