And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize