You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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