no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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