Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
