i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
