she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
