IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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