I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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