weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
