Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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