oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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