ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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