I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
How many fucks given?
0.12846
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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