Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
