I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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