Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
