I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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