...so i touched it.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
