what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
