god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Randomize
