Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
okay pat passed out under dana's car
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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