i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize