that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize
