An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
