Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
