Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
