Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
