absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize