I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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