This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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