Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize