I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
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