other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
you're hired as official boob wrangler
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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